I am completely an utterly heartbroken.  Last night, I came home from work, had a normal evening, ate dinner, fed the dogs, put the dogs in their crates and we headed off to Sasha Farm (a farm animal sanctuary that we volunteer at).  Same thing we do every Monday.  Nothing different.  All the dogs were their normal selves.  All ate well, all acted normal, all barked and ran up the stairs when we yelled "bedtime"..well, except Roscoe- we carry him because his hind legs are bad.  But normal as normal can be.

We come home after a couple hours.  Dogs barking when we come in.  My husband goes upstairs to let the dogs out.  I hear the crate open, dogs run out, but...something is off.  Then I heard him yell something that I just couldn't process: "I think Holly is dead!"

I ran up the stairs. Holly was dead.  And we have no idea why.  She looked like she just died in her sleep.  She was laying in the spot that she always sleeps in.  She was on her left side, which she either sleeps like that or on her back.  But she was dead.  I was instantly crushed.

Holly was only 4 (almost 5) years old.  She was my beloved Welsh Corgi.  A few years ago (May of 2006) she was diagnosed with having an extra vein that was diverting blood around her liver.  So, we spent $5,000 to get her surgery.  If you have read my blog for a long time, you may remember this picture:

After her surgery, she seemed extremely healthy.  Blood tests showed her liver functions were normal, and nothing seemed wrong.  The only thing that we can make any sense of is that she had something like a heart attack or a blood clot that was linked to whatever caused the liver problem. 

She seemed so healthy, though.  Even that day, nothing was odd about her. She was just being her typical, crazy self.

It was dark, cold and raining when we buried her last night.  I sat there staring at the hole dug next to by best bud, Quincey, who died from cushings 3 years ago, and I thought: "You weren't the dog that was supposed to be buried here.  You're way too young".

Oddly enough, cold days were her favorite.  Just last night, during dinner, my husband said: "Holly is going to want to stay out there until Spring".  Unfortunately, she'll always be out there, now.  And, I'm completely heartbroken.

RIP my dear Holly.  You were an awesome dog, and we will always miss you.