A silly place filled with caffeine induced ramblings of this person named KarmaGirl....or something.
It just doesn't make sense
Published on September 30, 2008 By KarmaGirl In Pets & Nature

I am completely an utterly heartbroken.  Last night, I came home from work, had a normal evening, ate dinner, fed the dogs, put the dogs in their crates and we headed off to Sasha Farm (a farm animal sanctuary that we volunteer at).  Same thing we do every Monday.  Nothing different.  All the dogs were their normal selves.  All ate well, all acted normal, all barked and ran up the stairs when we yelled "bedtime"..well, except Roscoe- we carry him because his hind legs are bad.  But normal as normal can be.

We come home after a couple hours.  Dogs barking when we come in.  My husband goes upstairs to let the dogs out.  I hear the crate open, dogs run out, but...something is off.  Then I heard him yell something that I just couldn't process: "I think Holly is dead!"

I ran up the stairs. Holly was dead.  And we have no idea why.  She looked like she just died in her sleep.  She was laying in the spot that she always sleeps in.  She was on her left side, which she either sleeps like that or on her back.  But she was dead.  I was instantly crushed.

Holly was only 4 (almost 5) years old.  She was my beloved Welsh Corgi.  A few years ago (May of 2006) she was diagnosed with having an extra vein that was diverting blood around her liver.  So, we spent $5,000 to get her surgery.  If you have read my blog for a long time, you may remember this picture:

After her surgery, she seemed extremely healthy.  Blood tests showed her liver functions were normal, and nothing seemed wrong.  The only thing that we can make any sense of is that she had something like a heart attack or a blood clot that was linked to whatever caused the liver problem. 

She seemed so healthy, though.  Even that day, nothing was odd about her. She was just being her typical, crazy self.

It was dark, cold and raining when we buried her last night.  I sat there staring at the hole dug next to by best bud, Quincey, who died from cushings 3 years ago, and I thought: "You weren't the dog that was supposed to be buried here.  You're way too young".

Oddly enough, cold days were her favorite.  Just last night, during dinner, my husband said: "Holly is going to want to stay out there until Spring".  Unfortunately, she'll always be out there, now.  And, I'm completely heartbroken.

RIP my dear Holly.  You were an awesome dog, and we will always miss you.

Comments (Page 2)
on Sep 30, 2008

Mike, ToughLove, Anthony and Dr. Guy, thank you for your comments.  Pets do indeed become family, and you get used to their routines.  Even the things that drove you nuts about them are missed when they are gone.

on Sep 30, 2008

 Very sad for your loss of a sweet, loved pet.  I hope the love for other animals helps to heal the void...

on Oct 02, 2008

The ends always come way, way too soon.

Ain't that the truth! 

I've been saying that if there is a god, that he hates my guts for some reason.  Then I was telling my husband that I must have been a really bad person in a previous life, but my next life will be OK...too bad I won't know it.  So, in his words of wisdom he said: "How ironic is it that we were at an animal sanctuary, you know..helping animals.  And, while we are away helping animals, our dog dies.  I mean, what the hell?!"  As we get older, I think my husband and I get more alike, as I had been thinking the same thing, I just didn't say it.  LOL  This sucks.