A silly place filled with caffeine induced ramblings of this person named KarmaGirl....or something.
It just doesn't make sense
Published on September 30, 2008 By KarmaGirl In Pets & Nature

I am completely an utterly heartbroken.  Last night, I came home from work, had a normal evening, ate dinner, fed the dogs, put the dogs in their crates and we headed off to Sasha Farm (a farm animal sanctuary that we volunteer at).  Same thing we do every Monday.  Nothing different.  All the dogs were their normal selves.  All ate well, all acted normal, all barked and ran up the stairs when we yelled "bedtime"..well, except Roscoe- we carry him because his hind legs are bad.  But normal as normal can be.

We come home after a couple hours.  Dogs barking when we come in.  My husband goes upstairs to let the dogs out.  I hear the crate open, dogs run out, but...something is off.  Then I heard him yell something that I just couldn't process: "I think Holly is dead!"

I ran up the stairs. Holly was dead.  And we have no idea why.  She looked like she just died in her sleep.  She was laying in the spot that she always sleeps in.  She was on her left side, which she either sleeps like that or on her back.  But she was dead.  I was instantly crushed.

Holly was only 4 (almost 5) years old.  She was my beloved Welsh Corgi.  A few years ago (May of 2006) she was diagnosed with having an extra vein that was diverting blood around her liver.  So, we spent $5,000 to get her surgery.  If you have read my blog for a long time, you may remember this picture:

After her surgery, she seemed extremely healthy.  Blood tests showed her liver functions were normal, and nothing seemed wrong.  The only thing that we can make any sense of is that she had something like a heart attack or a blood clot that was linked to whatever caused the liver problem. 

She seemed so healthy, though.  Even that day, nothing was odd about her. She was just being her typical, crazy self.

It was dark, cold and raining when we buried her last night.  I sat there staring at the hole dug next to by best bud, Quincey, who died from cushings 3 years ago, and I thought: "You weren't the dog that was supposed to be buried here.  You're way too young".

Oddly enough, cold days were her favorite.  Just last night, during dinner, my husband said: "Holly is going to want to stay out there until Spring".  Unfortunately, she'll always be out there, now.  And, I'm completely heartbroken.

RIP my dear Holly.  You were an awesome dog, and we will always miss you.

Comments (Page 1)
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on Sep 30, 2008

Beautiful dog!  The last picture is especially gorgeous. 


I'm so sorry for your loss.

on Sep 30, 2008

My heart is broken for you.  There isn't much sadder than the loss of a pet, at any age.  Poor baby.  Please know that you guys will be in my thoughts.

on Sep 30, 2008

Aww..this is so sad.  Pets are just like members of the family. Especially dogs!! aww..

My parents had a similar situation happen to their cat this past summer.  Tootie was not diagnosed with any sort of problem, she was 6 years old and healthy, chasing the dog around...then she got sick and died on the day she was supposed to go to the vet.  The dog was lost for a few days....

I am sorry for your loss.

on Sep 30, 2008

I am sorry to hear this news.

The following poem gets me every time:

"Just this side of heaven is a place called Rainbow Bridge.

When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet goes to Rainbow Bridge.
There are meadows and hills for all of our special friends so they can run and play together.
There is plenty of food, water and sunshine, and our friends are warm and comfortable.

All the animals who had been ill and old are restored to health and vigor; those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days and times gone by.
The animals are happy and content, except for one small thing; they each miss someone very special to them, who had to be left behind.

They all run and play together, but the day comes when one suddenly stops and looks into the distance. His bright eyes are intent; His eager body quivers. Suddenly he begins to run from the group, flying over the green grass, his legs carrying him faster and faster.

You have been spotted, and when you and your special friend finally meet, you cling together in joyous reunion, never to be parted again. The happy kisses rain upon your face; your hands again caress the beloved head, and you look once more into the trusting eyes of your pet, so long gone from your life but never absent from your heart.

Then you cross Rainbow Bridge together..."

on Sep 30, 2008

I'm so very sorry for your loss. That is a terrible thing to bear. My father sent me this when we lost our family dog some time ago.

Being a veterinarian, I had been called to examine a ten-year-old Irish Wolf hound named Belker. The dog's owners, Ron, his wife Lisa, and their little boy Shane, were all very attached to Belker, and they were hoping for a miracle.

I examined Belker and found he was dying of cancer. I told the family we couldn't do anything for Belker, and offered to perform the euthanasia procedure for the old dog in their home.

As we made arrangements, Ron and Lisa told me they thought it would be good for six-year-old Shane to observe the procedure. They felt as though Shane might learn something from the experience.

The next day, I felt the familiar catch in my throat as Belker's family surrounded him. Shane seemed so calm, petting the old dog for the last time, that I wondered if he understood what was going on. Within a few minutes, Belker slipped peacefully away.

The little boy seemed to accept Belker's transition without any difficulty or confusion. We sat together for a while after Belker's Death, wondering aloud about the sad fact that animal lives are shorter than human lives. Shane, who had been listening quietly, piped up, 'I know why.'

Startled, we all turned to him. What came out of his mouth next stunned me. I'd never heard a more comforting explanation.

He said, 'People are born so that they can learn how to live a good Life -- like loving everybody all the time and being nice, right?' The Six-year-old continued, 'Well, dogs already know how to do that, so they don't have to stay as long.'

I hope that helps.



on Sep 30, 2008

I'm sorry KG.  

on Sep 30, 2008

I am so sorry for your loss.

on Sep 30, 2008

I'm sorry for your loss.

Our dogs (pets) are family and it's hard to lose them.

She is a beautiful dog.

on Sep 30, 2008

Thank you so much for the comments.

She was indeed a beautiful dog, both in appearance and personality.  She was a happy, gentle, soul.  The dogs seem to know what happened (they saw her and were allowed to sniff and nudge her) but they seem as lost as I am right now. 

In the wise words of my husband: "this sucks"

on Sep 30, 2008


on Sep 30, 2008

I'm very sorry to hear of your loss, KG.

Losing family is difficult, especially when it's sudden and unexpected. It sounds like Holly passed peacefully, which provides at least some comfort in such a distressing situation.

I wish you and your family the best.


on Sep 30, 2008

"this sucks"
I totally agree.  I'm so very sorry

on Sep 30, 2008

I'm sorry to hear about this loss, Angie, it's tough to lose a family dog, especially so unexpectedly.

on Sep 30, 2008

I know how it is to lose a beloved one.  I am sorry for your loss Karma.

on Sep 30, 2008

Have you considered an autopsy, just so you know what happened?

I talked to the Vet., and she said that, considering her past health issues, and the way that she was when we found her, the most likely cause was a blood clot that went to her heart and stopped it immediately.

We live on 2 acres, and the only neighbor that can get to our fence is one of my daughter's friends.  So, foul play is probably not a factor.  There was also no indication of poison or anything else as it was all so peaceful.  Plus, everyone loved this dog.  We've never had anyone ever complain about our dogs, or anyone complain about anything with us. 

I think her heart just stopped.  The blood clot theory makes sense to me.  She just looked like she fell asleep and just didn't wake up.  It was a peaceful end, but just an end that came way, way too soon.  I always thought she would be still alive when my daughter graduated from school in 7 years.  i worried about what it would be like to lose a dog around the same time that I had an "empty nest".  I guess my worries were in the wrong direction.

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